You're stupid!

Americans are stupid.

I know, some of you are shocked.

It's because you, too, are a stupid American. Don't worry, I'm guilty as well. Just not as guilty as you... you stupid American.

Today, I saw a bottle of hand sanitizer that said "12 oz. bonus!" -- That's right, 12 ounces of free hand sanitizer!

A normal American would snatch that up and say "wow, I'm saving money!"

Don't get me wrong, if you can get 12 extra ounces for free, I say go for it. That's not the point though.

The first thing that jumped into my head was "wow, how much am I over paying for hand sanitizer that they can suddenly offer me a full 12 extra ounces for 'free'?!"

You're only kidding yourself if you think that Johnson and Johnson is giving you extra sanitizer out of the kindness of their hearts. What I want to know is how much MORE sanitizer we could milk them for if we'd just smarten up and demand it!

SO RISE UP YOU STUPID AMERICANS! UNITE FOR MORE HAND SANITIZER AT A LOWER PRICE!

Then, if you're really smart, do the same for gas...



Stupid Americans...

Razer Barracuda AC-1 & HP-1

So, I had a LAN party over the weekend and I decided to finally snag a pair of HP-1 Gaming Headphones to accompany my AC-1 Sound Card. I was very impressed by the audio quality, but I was a little disappointed by the microphone. That is until I figured out how to tweak it.

The software that comes with the AC-1 is pretty cool, but it's not perfect. At least, on my machine, I had to open the Windows mixer from the Control Panel in order to boost the microphone. Once I boosted it, it worked fine. I'm very pleased by the headphones so far... I need to test them out a bit more, but I'd recommend them to anyone using an AC-1. They go hand in hand.

Scott Meyer

So, not only is Basic Instructions one of the best comics I've read, but creator, Scott Meyer is one of the funniest stand-up comics I've ever heard. Check out his shtick.

Tricky Numbers

And what have we learned today?

01 + 01 = nothing at all. 02 + 02 = nothing at all. 03 + 03 = nothing at all. 04 + 04 = nothing at all. 05 + 05 = nothing at all. 06 + 06 = nothing at all. 07 + 07 = nothing at all. 08 + 08 = nothing at all. 09 + 09 = nothing at all. 10 + 10 = nothing at all. 11 + 11 = nothing at all. 12 + 12 = nothing at all. 13 + 13 = nothing at all. 14 + 14 = nothing at all. 15 + 15 = nothing at all. 16 + 16 = nothing at all. 17 + 17 = nothing at all. 18 + 18 = nothing at all. 19 + 19 = nothing at all. 20 + 20 = nothing at all. 21 + 21 = nothing at all. 22 + 22 = nothing at all. 23 + 23 = nothing at all. 24 + 24 = nothing at all. 25 + 25 = nothing at all. 26 + 26 = nothing at all. 27 + 27 = nothing at all. 28 + 28 = nothing at all. 29 + 29 = nothing at all. 30 + 30 = nothing at all. 31 + 31 = nothing at all. 32 + 32 = nothing at all. 33 + 33 = nothing at all. 34 + 34 = nothing at all. 35 + 35 = nothing at all. 36 + 36 = nothing at all. 37 + 37 = nothing at all. 38 + 38 = nothing at all. 39 + 39 = nothing at all. 40 + 40 = nothing at all. 41 + 41 = nothing at all. 42 + 42 = nothing at all. 43 + 43 = nothing at all. 44 + 44 = nothing at all. 45 + 45 = nothing at all. 46 + 46 = nothing at all. 47 + 47 = nothing at all. 48 + 48 = nothing at all. 49 + 49 = nothing at all. 50 + 50 = nothing at all. 51 + 51 = nothing at all. 52 + 52 = nothing at all. 53 + 53 = nothing at all. 54 + 54 = nothing at all. 55 + 55 = nothing at all. 56 + 56 = nothing at all. 57 + 57 = nothing at all. 58 + 58 = nothing at all. 59 + 59 = nothing at all. 60 + 60 = nothing at all. 61 + 61 = nothing at all. 62 + 62 = nothing at all. 63 + 63 = nothing at all. 64 + 64 = nothing at all. 65 + 65 = nothing at all. 66 + 66 = nothing at all. 67 + 67 = nothing at all. 68 + 68 = nothing at all. 69 + 69 = nothing at all. 70 + 70 = nothing at all. 71 + 71 = nothing at all. 72 + 72 = nothing at all. 73 + 73 = nothing at all. 74 + 74 = nothing at all. 75 + 75 = nothing at all. 76 + 76 = nothing at all. 77 + 77 = nothing at all. 78 + 78 = nothing at all. 79 + 79 = nothing at all. 80 + 80 = nothing at all. 81 + 81 = nothing at all. 82 + 82 = nothing at all. 83 + 83 = nothing at all. 84 + 84 = nothing at all. 85 + 85 = nothing at all. 86 + 86 = nothing at all. 87 + 87 = nothing at all.  88 + 88 = nothing at all. 89 + 89 = nothing at all. 90 + 90 = nothing at all. 91 + 91 = nothing at all.  92 + 92 = nothing at all. 93 + 93 = nothing at all. 94 + 94 = nothing at all. 95 + 95 = nothing at all. 96 + 96 = nothing at all. 97 + 97 = nothing at all. 98 + 98 = nothing at all. 99 + 99 = nothing at all.

Dang, Dawg!

Children of this generation appear to be confused. Two days ago, I was at Dairy Queen enjoying a tasty treat. I overheard a lanky white girl, roughly 14 years old, shout across the room to her small group of white female friends "Dang, dawg!" She had a heavy South Texas accent and sounded completely ridiculous. Her outburst was followed by normal discourse. Her friends didn't call her out on it or anything. They just accepted it as normal speech. I couldn't help but think, "damn, that girl is wack!"

Thought of the day

There comes a time in every man's life when he wants to dress like an adult. I've yet to reach that point in my own life, however, I do want to dress less like a little girl.

WORD!

I was fooling around in MS Word again, and I found a quick shortcut that I think everyone should know. It's one that I've never bothered to search for, but I've always wondered what it is... So, fire up those word processors and I'll let you in on the secret.

You can easily toggle between ALL CAPS and standard caps!

•Step 1 - Type a word... any word... try "Word".
•Step 2 - Place your cursor over in the middle of the word and hit "CTRL+SHIFT+A"

Neat, 'eh? Try it again... IT REVERTS BACK! Yeah, it's that simple.

You can thank me later.